If only someone could make a Spotify-style app for eating out - a service which took your likes and preferences and suggested similar venues.
Sure, it would sap the fun out of discovering new places under your own steam, but it would save a huge amount of wasted time and reduce the number of 'well that's one meal I ain't getting back'.
Of course, this time I could have used my intuition and read the signs. The grey-haired patrons clinking their cutlery in rhyme. The elderly just don't know a bad pub when they see it.
It's difficult to know where to start with The Sanctuary House - a pub and hotel owned by Fuller's brewery. The disinterested bar staff and the spelling mistake riddled menu (substainable fish fingers?) would be a good place. The pie though - advertised in large letters on the door - was incredibly bad. On the table so fast I could still hear the ring of the ping from the microwave. A hideously salty and jaw-strainingly chewy beef an ale filling, accompanied by cold chips and undercooked vegetables.
And that's where I'll finish. Next time I'm caught out somewhere unfamiliar, I'll go home for toast.